50 Things a True Muscovite Would Never Say

1.Oh, look, free Wi-Fi!

2. No, thanks, I've had enough tea.

3. Waiters are not my servants, they're just doing their job.

4. Do you know any nice Central Asians/Dagestanis who might like to rent my apartment?

5. I'll grab the car. Be there in five.
6. Why are there sunflower seed hulls on the ground?

7. Oh, fireworks! There must be something very special going on.

8. In my experience, you can always count on the police to be friendly and helpful.

9. You know what they say, whistle while you work.

10. Let's not splurge on the underground.

 11. Craig David, Sade and Boyzone are so yesterday.

 12. No thanks, I don't need a plastic bag for that one orange I bought.

 13. Jobs are hard to come by as a native English speaker.

 14. You know, I really wish people would put up a few more flags.

 15. We can cycle there, it'll be fun!

 16. You know, my mum also has her faults.

18. I know a fancy place — let's meet at Yolki Palki!

19. Dill on pizza/sushi/cappuccino? That's odd.

20. Heels? I actually prefer ballet flats, much more comfortable.

21. I never haggle with cab drivers.

22. Mayonnaise in moderation, that's my mantra.

 23. Let's spray some more antifreeze chemical mix on the roads. My car's not dirty enough.

 24. Now that's just superstitious nonsense.

 25. I can't believe how cheap the beer is in this bar.

 26. This city could do with a few more museums.

 27. I'm only in my twenties, so there's still plenty of time to find a husband.

 28. And of course, the whole building is wheelchair accessible.

 29. Truth be told, I don't really care that much about ice hockey.

 30. I'll just switch off the heating.

 31. I'll just switch off the air conditioning.

 32. I'll just switch off the lights.

33. I fall for women who look natural — after all, it's inner beauty that counts.

34. My family and I really aren't that close.

35. A small car just makes more sense for inner city driving.

36. The road is for cars, the pavement is for people.

37. I like my water straight out of the tap.

 38. No need to reserve a table, we can just show up.

 39. I'm sorry, did I get in your way?

 40. Combining sushi and pasta is just plain wrong.

 41. We're taking our kids to see the CSKA - Spartak match. You know, for some safe, family fun.

 42. No parking here.

 43. We just sold our car, public transport works fine for us.

 44. No bench? Let's just sit on the grass then.

 45. Plombir ice-cream? I'd rather have Häagen-Dazs.

47. Thanks, no more vodka for me tonight.

48. Being friends with foreigners is an enriching experience that helps broaden your horizon.

49. Washing your hands once a day is more than enough.

50. And I told her, just French nails, you know, nice and simple.

Extract from The Moscow Times 

[GO Back]   [2022-03-15 05:19:12 PM]

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